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Apr 26

Oakleigh House and Pink Slips

A friend (Darren) just posted a note in Facebook telling Emma and I that Eddie Izzard is campaigning in Swansea today and that he may try to get to his old School, Oakleigh House, at some point today.

This has got me thinking about the whole concept of relationship “pink slips”.

We all have these visions of nights of steamy passion that we are allowed to have during our relationship with the complete out of reachers that we idolise.

I mean, My pink slip list includes Angelina Jolie, Christina Applegate, Nicole Kidman and Natalie Portman.

If I meet any of these women and by some absolute co-incidence some form of chemistry starts up and I end up in the sack with them, according to my pink slip agreement with Emma, that is OK.

Now we have made some amendments to the pink slip ruling.

First off, we agreed that a pink slip can only be called if we are not together at the same event as this would not be simply allowing your partner to live out a fantasy, but would have a bit of a cheecky slap in the face feel to it too.

As pink slips are supposed to be a boon, the negative aspect of this threw the positive off of the boon and as such we remedied it.

Ok, it also kinda means that the odds of the perfect confluence of events ever occurring are reduced that much more.

Lets face it, I am never going to meet Christina Applegate on a big night out where she is feeling particularly randy for some ad hoc action and I happen to be at the same place WITHOUT Emma…

Having said that, Emma just called to let me know that Eddie Izzard as part of his Swansea campaign is playing tonight at the Dylan Thomas theatre in Swansea and she is organising tickets… and here I sit typing on the train heading to London… *sigh*

So, I rack my brain trying to think if Eddie was ever formally mentioned as a pink slip guy…

Unfortunately tickets are sold out so I can sleep easy tonight, though I would rather have had Ema laughing her arse off all night because let’s face it, we set up things like pink slips because we know they aren’t ever going to happen. Even if the world’s most bizarre sequence of events did in fact occur and either of us were faced with some sexual hero in a close and personal encounter, I know that nothing would be enacted on.

Fantasies should remain as fantasies. The moment you find out that your idol is in fact just another woman who is probably not even as cool as the one who loves you completely, is a sad day.

I am all for fantasy, but have decided that no matter what happens, I will keep them as exactly that….