Seriously, that is how I felt in the early hours of Saturday the 1st of September 2012…I was Brad helplessly watching my Janet fight androids in her belly and just hoping that somehow I would survive the ordeal with my Janet safe and the android bundled neatly into a wrap…
Well, everything turned out great, in the end, the labour wasn’t fun, Emma somehow managed to hang on for more than eight hours without any drugs and I survived the full ordeal with no broken fingers. The emergency procedures and the panic at seeing my strong wife so beleaguered after such an epic struggle was the hardest part for both of us but once we were holding the new addition in our arms it all got forgotten rather quickly.
Julian Elwood Danger Gill (registered as Wyatt Harvey Danger Gill but we reserved the right to change our minds ) was born to us as a tiny little human weighing in at 3.26 kilograms and looking like a wise little monk.
I know he is wise, he is, after all, my son…
Be that as it may, my previous blog post was on August 31st and was published at noon. Who knew that a little over 12 hours later I would be crying and smiling and hopping around with joy and relief?
Who knew that a little under four months later and I would be on the edge of 2013, looking back into 2012 to see all the things that had come to pass and to plan the things still to come and be thinking to myself… “Self, this was a fucking good year! Let’s have some more like that!”
Refocussing parental energies around two kids from having only one is no mean feat. Emma and I have worked hard to ensure that Griffin still feels like he is the centre of our universe and only that he now shares the centre of the universe with another little being who adores him and whom he adores.
This has kept us busy beyond anything I thought possible, to a point where even my idle time pursuits have all been shelved in light of spending more play time with Griff or sleep time with Emma when the chances arose.
The past four months have seen us not only celebrate the birth of little Julian Elwood Danger, but also seen my mom come to visit from the USA to meet her new Grandson, Emma and I decided to become vegan’s with a softer start at vegetarian, Griffin started karate, we had a wonderful Halloween, Griffin turned 8, we celebrated our 3 year anniversary in this house, changed real estate agents three times, Christmas has been and gone and my mom came out for a crazy four day whirlwind visit then too, JUST to keep a promise she made to Griff! I aspire to be the kind of grandparent she is
I mention Griffin started karate, this is a big thing for him and a massively difficult thing for me…
Ok, so maybe you didn’t want to watch 10 minutes of me being beaten up by my eight year old, but he will be relishing these moments where he gets to shout “NO MORE MR NICE GUY!” for years to come.
I, sadly, will be feeling the bruises for as long as he thinks he still needs to hit me with all his might… Even sadder is that Julian is going to grow up watching his poor old dad being beaten by his idolized big brother and he will want to follow suit… What have I done?
While Emma and the kids are the focus of my entire existence, there are many other things that I do and want to do that help me remain defined as who I am.
Watching another year roll towards me I have decided to focus a small part of my attention to something i have wanted to do for as far back as I can remember, all the way back to Standard 2 when I first read “The Hobbit”.
I want to write.
Not the corporate stuff I output on a daily basis, but fictional work that tests and works my creativity and imagination in ways I have hitherto not yet fully explored. To that end, after a wonderful chat with the fantastic Nerine Dorman, I am all charged up and ready to go.
In the coming months you will see this humble little blog start to put out weekly short stories as I feel my way around story writing, please feel free to comment and critique, both good and bad, let me know what you felt and what you’d like to see more of.
Interspersed through that you will find the usual fare of family life updates and other bits that tickle my fancy for my blog is my musing point, it is where I store my thoughts for posterity…
So roll on 2013, raising babies, writing stories, growing, developing and living life, for if there is one thing the MBE has taught me, it is that a life unlived isn’t a life at all.